So I followed through on my committment to myself. The last three days I have literally spent hours pouring through state websites, national databases and heart galleries, looking at the profiles of kids who we might be a match for. O and I even decided to expand our search parameters, considering much older kids than we were initially looking at.
I've sent probably 30 initial contacts to case workers in all the state that are within driving distance of our home, and have heard back from most of them. Some were quite enthusiastic. All requested our home study. Some state require it from our worker directly. Others are fine with the individual submitting it.
I have a copy of our home study on my computer. Our worker sent it to me to proof read which was a good thing, since they had about 25 things wrong on it, including our dates of birth and even my name in one place. (I am not Mrs. Sealy. Don't even know Mrs. Sealy.)
I was hopeful that I could just send it out to the states that weren't particular about who submitted it. Nope.
I was hopeful, then, that our worker could send out the "official" copies since she has the original. Nope.
Our state requires us to send a letter to the state office requesting that our official home study be sent to one state. One state only. I have to include the contact name of the person we've been in touch with and the child we are interested in. (Of course, there are SEVERAL kids in each of the states, and the contact people are different for each child. I am too angry to even ASK if my state will send several home study copies to one state or if it can only be one at a time.)
After the home study is sent out of state, our state gives that state THREE MONTHS to decide whether they will use us as a resource. We cannot pursue any other out of state children during that time.
THEN, if the other state doesn't use us as a resource, we can craft yet another letter to the state office requesting that our home study be sent to ANOTHER state about ANOTHER child.
Oh, and let's not forget that I can't even send a letter to the state for several weeks because we've changed the age range of the child we're interested in and it will take that long to get that corrected in the home study and in the state's computer system.
I understand that they would much prefer for us to adopt a child from our state. We would too! But it seems to me that they are doing everything possible to discourage us from looking outside the state.
Just heard one of those, "You'd make a great parent to an older child in foster care" bullshit commercials. I'd love to rewrite the copy for that particular ad, except they wouldn't be able to air it on the radio.
