I am so grateful for the outpouring of support I’ve received from all of you the past few days. Your comments and e-mails were just what I needed to snap me out of my funk.
I am many things but I am not a quitter, and I am not ready to give up on adopting from the foster system – not by a long shot. Rather, I have decided to become Mia’s supervisor’s shadow, checking in each week for a status report on our home study. Yes, I’m quite certain that she’s going to get sick of hearing from me but I spent months sitting back, waiting and assuming that Mia was actually doing the job she was paid to do. That got me nowhere. So now, a more proactive (translated: irritating) approach seems appropriate.
Y’all lit a fire under me. I can’t thank you enough.
The weekend that I was dreading turned out beautifully.
Friday was our nephew’s graduation. The pre-graduation cookout at my SIL’s house was fine. As you may recall, I’d been dreading seeing the girl who’d e-mailed me about her IF and then stopped communicating altogether once she got pregnant. She was there with her newborn. I didn’t have it in me to go up and oooh and aaah over the baby, more because my feelings are still hurt about the way I was treated rather than anything to do with the baby. But the house was absolutely packed with family so it was easy to engage in conversations elsewhere and lose myself in the chaos.
Graduation itself was a big yawn. The superintendent lead off the ceremony with what was possibly the world’s most boring speech. Think statistics on the free school lunch program and the testing of English as Second Language students. He then proceeded to finish his speech with a long list of quotes from famous men, all run together with no comments in between. I am told that he does that every single year. Anyway, I happened to zone back in for the quote I think I needed to hear.
“Never never never give up.” – Winston Churchill
Of course, what he actually said was:
“Never, never, in nothing great or small, large or petty, never give in except to convictions of honour and good sense. Never yield to force; never yield to the apparently overwhelming might of the enemy.”
Timely, I thought, not that Mia is "the enemy".
We had a lot of friends in town for graduation weekend so we decided to take advantage of it and have a big barbecue at our house on Saturday night – about 25 people including a few kids. Luckily I was almost done cooking several of the things that go into my picnic-type salads when my oven and burners stopped working about 7:30 a.m. on Saturday morning. Sigh! Thankfully my neighbors let us cook the baked beans in their oven. Anyway, it was a good time and everyone went away happily stuffed, I think.
But to you parents of children between the ages of two and four . . . when you’re done at the computer, just go lay down for a few minutes. I am quite certain that you need a nap. You DESERVE a nap! I was tired just watching the moms and dads at our picnic chasing their little ones around.
Saturday’s other big adventure? I went to see “Sex and the City” with one of my friends. How much did I love that movie?!?!? I laughed and cried. I missed those girls!
So the weekend I dreaded was wonderful - filled with family and friends and wonderful memories. I am so happy about that.
Well, I’d best get on with my day but again THANK YOU to those of you who lifted me up when I needed it most. I can’t tell you how much I appreciate each and every one of you. If we end up finding our child in the foster system it will be, in part, because of YOU.
Happy week everybody!
