Wednesday, February 7, 2007

Food. Mine. Now. Lots.


Be very glad that you haven’t spent the last few days inside my head, ‘cause it’s sounded a little something like this:

“Is 5 a.m. too early to bake those spicy Cajun french fries? I wonder if we have anymore popsicles. Mmmmm, rice krispies! How many donuts are in those small packs? I’ll have two packs. Look at those cute heart-shaped snack cakes. I’ll have two of those also. Steak steak steak. Eat eat eat. Would it be wrong to just get a bowl of ranch dressing, float a couple of pieces of lettuce in it, and call it a salad? I’d like a number one with everything including cheese and a sprite to drink. I’d like a number one with everything including cheese, no tomato or pickle, and a sprite to drink. Can I get some extra white sauce with that? Cheese popcorn and Whoppers – a winning combination. The people at Dominos Pizza are culinary geniuses. I know we haven’t had lunch yet but what’s for dinner? No, 30 degrees isn’t too cold to get a peanut buster parfait. A corndog would just hit the spot. Peanut butter cups are food of the gods. Where’s the turkey? Food food food. Mine mine mine. Now now now. Lots lots lots.”

Damned Prometrium.

I have never experienced anything like this, even taking Provera for 3 years. I feel actual constant physical hunger.

Seven days and TEN POUNDS later I clearly saw this morning that I had to get control. I didn’t work hard to lose 100+ pounds only to put it all back on now!

I’ve certainly been eating more often than “normal” today, but I’ve made healthier choices and worked out for the first time this week. I feel better, but still have the “food food food” chant running through my head.

Once I’m done with the Prometrium, and my period starts, things should kick into high gear – an appt. with the NP for a blood draw and ultrasound, a HSG a few days later, and starting the injectables somewhere in between (I think!). I’m ready to get this show on the road, but time just seems to drag. If it’s this bad now, I can’t imagine what I’ll do during the 2WW! Perhaps I need to take up a new hobby.

As long as it’s not cooking or baking, I should be fine.